Making A Dent In The Universe

Jobs:
            A Genius, a Revolutionary, a Nerd, an Innovator, a Business Man, a Go-Getter, and then Steve Jobs. All of these first, himself second, and yet his world was made up of nothing more. Everyone knows his story for the most part. He founded one of the biggest technological companies in the world starting out of his parents' garage and gained a reputation to be one of the shrewdest, cruelest businessmen the world had ever seen. Steve Jobs became more than anyone ever expected and taught himself how to talk up what he was walking up. Ashton Kutcher delivers the best performance of his career thus far and really turns heads as he portrays the titan that was Steve Jobs. The only drawback was the film that he found himself acting in, but we'll get to that in a little bit.

            Joshua Michael Stern (Swing Vote) headed up the project of directing Jobs but credit has to be given to his casting team. The sole aspect that made this film entirely watchable was Ashton Kutcher putting on the act of lashing out at subordinates and screaming on the phone at a rival billionaire all while wearing the blue jeans, lame tennis shoes, and trimmed beard that made up the man that made his mark in the universe. Without giving anything away, the opening scene itself made me question if we were watching an old video of Jobs or if it was just Mr. Kutcher. Well okay, enough about the Punk'd host for now and maybe a little about what this film was all about.

            Apple Computers started very small with only 5 employees that could not even be paid in cash but they had one thing the other competitors did not, Steve Jobs. This film revolves around how and why Jobs left college to pursue bigger things, like calligraphy and acid, and then pulled some business skills out of his back pocket and became an icon. Josh Gad (Love and Other Drugs) plays the other half of Jobs' success, Steve "Woz" Wozniak. Whenever Jobs was in a bind with what he was selling, Woz was there to helping him sort out the bugs. I'd like to go on the record saying Josh Gad should be on watch by the members of The Academy for a Best Supporting Actor nomination. Not necessarily saying he'll get it but that he should not be overshadowed by the weak plot of this film. Along side Kutcher, Gad is spot on as Apple's second father and is near flawless in his portrayal. J.K. Simmons (Spider-Man), Dermot Mulroney (Zodiac), and Matthew Modine (The Dark Knight Rises) are all fellow business men that are out for Jobs' throat and make up a decent supporting cast as well.

            Now I guess is as good a time as any to address the physical being of the film; it's plot. There's not much to say besides how good the acting is by the two stars and, oh yeah, the years jump around like rabbits and details are left hanging. One can imagine how disappointing this could be especially in a movie about someone who became so prominent in our lifetimes even if he was rather cold-blooded. An analogy for the non-viewer reading this prior to buying a ticket would be that Jobs is The Social Network with a more realistic star, just as good character-wise, but with a weaker, less thought-provoking plot. Hats off to Ashton Kutcher and his memorable performance but it is a shame it had to be set apart from the film itself due to nothing more than lack of detail. Hashtag RIPSteveJobs. Grade: 6.6/10

Keeping Up With The Millers

We're The Millers:

             Have you heard of that actress Jennifer Aniston? She's in her forties now but she has a great future in movies if she keeps it up. It's easy to say that Mrs. Aniston steals the show in her latest flick with her charisma that never seems to age plus her timeless physical features that landed her this past year at the #1 spot on the list of the hottest women of all time. This is just one feature that makes We're The Millers a solidly funny movie with a cast that meshed well for the most part. From Rawson Marshall Thurber, director and writer of Dodgeball, who knew smuggling marijuana could really bring the family together.

            Okay, we talked about how hot Jennifer Aniston is--check that off the list. Next on the agenda is a man who has hosted award shows, made his way on Saturday Night Live, and now has developed a trademark sense of humor with his deep booming voice; all this is Jason Sudeikis. You may know him best from his work in Hall Pass (2011) or Horrible Bosses (2011) both of which deliver the crude laughs and lewd jokes that this movie does and, to be honest, if you loved him in those movies then We're The Millers is the next ticket you should purchase. I think it's easy to wrap his style in a nutshell (or for me at least but who cares, right?) and it is not a hard concept to get one's head around. Simply taking something in current news or something that is familiar in the past decade and using it as a reference to describe the way someone sounds or why the woman crossing the street is dressed the way she is a style Mr. Sudeikis has raised to an art form. He's lucky because it works for him and his delivery of these lines give him an advantage that kind of completes his character in whatever movie he seems to be in. But is there such thing as too much of a good thing? Even if it's a funny joke?---Especially if it's a funny joke, actually.

            One of the final things that needs to be analyzed in a movie like this one is the supporting cast. Usually I do not go super deep into the actors that lie beyond those that are top-billed but it's too difficult to avoid here. In this family there is a gorgeous mom, a funny-guy dad, an obediently confused son, and a rebellious quick witted daughter. Will Poulter (The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of Dawn Treader) and Emma Roberts (Nancy Drew) are the two whippersnappers that, I have to admit, have some of the funniest parts in the movie and step into the scene with a bang that beckons for more. These two play polar opposite characters and pull off awkwardness and coming of age impressively, which came as a shock to this writer. Finally on this list, Ed Helms (The Hangover), Kathryn Hahn (Step Brothers), and Nick Offerman (Parks and Recreation) head up a supporting cast that does a great job of supporting the main characters (shocking, I know). The point I'm trying to make is that these lesser actors brought a lot of memorable parts themselves to a movie that wouldn't normally rely on their support. It was refreshing (good word) to be able to laugh at someone else besides the faces on the movie poster for once.

           No, We're The Millers does not get my vote for motion picture of the year candidate or best comedy but it had some surprising factors that set it a bit higher than what could have been expected. Good laughs but a simple plot which brought a different take on a "family comedy". Grade: 6.8/10

How To Out-Do A Classic

The Conjuring:
            If you happen to see a door at the end of a long hallway open by itself would you be the one that everyone in the theater yells at to stop walking toward it? That's pretty much how it goes down in James Wan's latest film and is the same reason it is as frightening as walking down that hallway in real life. The Conjuring, a more realistic Exorcist, takes what Linda Blair put on the table 40 years ago and ups the ante to another level of horror that sets it a part from other movies we've seen in the same genre.

           A family moves into an old house out in the country. Subtle, weird things begin to happen at night. A professional is called in to make the monster leave the closet... Sound familiar? Sound like every horror movie you've seen, right? Oh, but this is a story based on actual events. Now the tables have turned. That one little detail always seems to amplify the terror in any movie for some reason and that tagline alone is why movies like this do so well in the box office. Another reason could be that James Wan is beginning to build a name for himself with the other white-knucklers such as Insidious, Saw, and Saw 3 that he all directed as well. His use of suspense with tactics such as having the camera follow the character around a dark corner or the lack of the super loud noises every time there's a ghost is how he is taking a different path in this industry of fear and standing out from other current directors.

            Ed and Lorraine Warren are the leading paranormal researchers and demonology experts that have a new fish to fry in the form of a presence that can't get enough of terrorizing the Perron family. Meanwhile, Carolyn and Roger Perron just want the best for their 5 daughters (sounds like a nightmare already, huh?) but there's something getting in the way of their success and it's taken up residence in whatever room has an empty bed. Throughout the process of the Warrens helping the Perrons, you will find yourself wanting to look away as each door slowly creaks open or as the melody stops playing in a certain small antique music box but the riveting silences are really what divert your eyes at the last moment before the scare happens. Also, I think anyone who sees this may become a little sensitive the next time you hear two solo claps. Just an observation, though.

             Patrick Wilson (Insidious) and Vera Farmiga (The Departed) are quite an effective devil-studying couple on screen with their own past playing well with the unorthodox methods they perform on a daily basis at the office. Lili Taylor (Born on the Fourth of July) gives one of the most terrifying performances and Linda Blair a run for her money along with her husband Ron Livingston (Office Space) who's just trying to figure this ordeal out. It should be obvious now that Wan delivers in this highly-anticipated flick with the history behind it doesn't let up either. Grade: 7.7/10

Rated G for Good

Monsters University:
            In order to be a good scarer, first you have to be a hard studier. The moral of Mike Wazowski and Sulley's prequel of how they met in college is something any young boy or girl can learn from if they want to become the best in whatever field they want. I know this isn't a film adaptation, it's a film review... right? So I guess I'll start now. With a movie theater filled with parents and grandparents taking their little ones to a kid-friendly movie, one could get rather annoyed whenever one of the small individuals gets up and walks around in the middle of the film but, luckily, said film is pretty entertaining and is filled with a lot of recognizable voices if you happen to have a trained ear. Pixar hasn't really let an audience down when they attempt to produce a heartwarming end (or beginning, in this case) to a story we have come to know, love, and constantly quote over the past decade and Monsters University is no exception to this trend.

            After first seeing commercials for this prequel to the 2001 recent classic, Monsters, Inc., I was relatively excited and knew I'd find myself setting in a theater watching it sooner or later. Pixar has given us classics such as Toy Story 1-3, Finding Nemo, A Bug's Life, Wall-E, and the list goes on and on but not one of these blockbuster hits have disappointed viewers from all walks of life and it has proven to dominate the animated film industry since its inception. Seeing that little lamp hop across the screen and stomp down the "i" in Pixar like a boss is something that has become an icon in film history and, even now in my early twenties, is a sign that what I'm about to see will stand apart from other animated films simply because of one company's reputation... This is what goes through my head, can you believe that? Good, then believe that Monsters University delivers like its predecessors.

           You have the usuals: Billy Crystal and John Goodman head up the cast as Mike Wazowski and James P. "Sulley" Sullivan. Two names that are Hollywood icons all by themselves. The supporting cast includes Steve Buscemi returning as the slithering, invisible Randall along with some newcomers like Helen Mirren (The Queen), Alfred Molina (Spider-Man 2), and Charlie Day (It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia). Afraid that they may not have what it takes to make it to Monsters Inc. after college, Mike and Sulley have to prove to a certain legendary professor (Mirren) that they are scarier than what meets the eye(s). The cast is a blend of greatness and humor that keeps the kids as well as the adults chuckling. One would not expect a "college movie" to have a G rating but this pulls through as a family fun time appealing to a 7 year old, a 22 year old, or a 60 year old--take your pick. But still check under your bed before sleep. Grade: 7.1/10

           

A Cowboy and An Indian

The Lone Ranger:
            Before I begin I have a quick scenario: Imagine you're walking through a museum and one of the exhibits comes to life starts telling you its story--would you stop and listen or would you call security? It would probably have some cool stuff to say of course, but, then again so would a person being kept on display 24 hours a day for the general public. Do you follow me? Neither do I. You could say it's a little confusing when an American classic such as The Lone Ranger is made to be almost a mockery of what it stood for by Hollywood and even more baffling when one of the most beloved actors in the world is a part of it.

            Johnny Depp has portrayed almost every personality one can think of and has made is career of three decades one of the most mesmerizing to hit the screen. It's really difficult to find a starting place when addressing an actor of Depp's caliber because he has done so many things and it's easy to find yourself saying, "Oh yeah...I forgot he played that character too!" Truly this man is a chameleon in character and his choice of movies to act in have proven to be of great taste--this one being an exception. Another highly-anticipated film of the year has come up short and this guy is sorry to admit its short comings.

            There's really not that much that goes into the phenomenon that is The Lone Ranger. A white hat, white horse, white guy wearing a black mask, accompanied by a wise Native American riding a horse as well. Pretty simple concept that should be kept simple, right? Well Gore Verbinski (Pirates of the Caribbean) thought differently when taking this movie as his next directing job and decided to make it 150 minutes long. Jumping through time periods, stretching out scenes, making jokes that may be funny but just did not fit the subject or the era can't be put any simpler than "unnecessary". Verbinski's take on the Lone Ranger is a lead up of how he became what the legend from the 1950's made famous and tell more of the back story. Too much story and not enough Ranger.

            Armie Hammer (The Social Network) is our hero, the man behind the mask, if you will. Standing next to the likeness of a raven-clad Johnny Depp on screen while attempting to be the star of the same film is not an easy task, my friend, and Hammer was over-done and kind of annoying if I am going to be blunt. Sorry, nothing personal. To be more of an optimist, the cinematography was very well done and some of the camera shots alone were creative and captivating. The bad-ass "walking through the desert dust away from an explosion" was cool and worked for a film like this but I wish there was just more of that. In the favor of the characters themselves, I will say that Hammer does look the role well and pulls off the intimidating, skillful horse riding Clayton Moore established back in '49. Tonto has the sarcasm, stoic looks, monotoned voice, and wisdom that comes when Depp is doing his thing. Think of the facial expressions (and skin complexion) of Edward Scissorhands and then the mannerisms of Captain Jack Sparrow, that is how I picked out the transformation into The Lone Ranger's loyal sidekick. Not exactly how Tonto is imagined but is tolerable to some degree in this movie and, the last time I checked, Tonto did not use more than four or five words in a sentence.

            Some final thoughts include a weak supporting cast. These are more great actors such as Helena Bonham Carter (The King's Speech) and Barry Pepper (Saving Private Ryan) just not firing on all cylinders- literally- in this film. If I seem to be coming down hard, I am, but you should still see The Lone Ranger for yourself if you feel the need. Hey, my buddy sitting next to me in the theater seemed to disagree on what I had to say. Still following me, Kemosabe? Grade: 5.7/10

Summer's Funniest Movie-- 2013 Edition

This Is The End:
            From the people that brought you every movie you've laughed at in the past decade are at it again...and they're not finished. The apocalypse is happening during the shindig of the year and you're surrounded by Hollywood's young and brightest stars, what do you do? Keep Calm and Party On is what you do! You may remember a couple guys named Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg, a comedy power duo that came up with the script of Superbad when they were 13 years old (that's right, I said it) and now they aren't 13 anymore, they're done with puberty and they are the directors and writers of 2013's funniest summer movie/celebration of acting and living it up with the ones you love.

            Go on IMDb.com (International Movie Database), search This Is The End and take a look at the cast list. If you don't know around 57 of the names credited in this movie then I think this may not be the motion picture for you. You may have seen the commercials on TV or read an article in your favorite magazine that shows how chock full this movie is with every actor in the current spotlight and the love interest of every girl (i.e. James Franco), boy (i.e. Emma Watson), and pot head (i.e. the rest of the cast) you can think of. For the purpose of this review we will just focus on the important names. Jay Baruchel (She's Out of My League) and Seth Rogen head over to James Franco's house [exactly as you would picture a house James Franco would live in] for a bash and so that Jay can be introduced to some James' friends. One thing leads to another, earthquakes strange lights from the sky--the usual--- and Franco (Pineapple Express), Baruchel, Rogen (Superbad), Craig Robinson (Pineapple Express), Jonah Hill (Superbad), and Danny McBride (Pineapple Express) try to find every which way to survive the eminent demise of the human race by staying inside of James Franco's outlandishly awesome crib.

            The ridiculousness of this movie is off the charts there's absolutely no denying that. But the cool thing about each huge star playing his or herself is that the audience can almost be a part of the inside jokes that are shared and laugh out loud along with this weed-smoking individuals basking in their friendship. Before going into the theater (assuming that you'll be smart enough to buy a ticket), you can't be expecting the next Academy Award winning picture. You see this movie to laugh with your friends as the actors are laughing with their friends. Each personality is a caricatured version of the person the general public thinks they know all too well and that is where Evan Goldberg and Seth Rogen hit one out of the park and were likely as high as the heavens while writing this script. Emma Watson (Hermione Granger) stops by for some fun outside of Hogwarts and Michael Cera (Superbad) blows cocaine into the face of Christopher Mintz-Plasse (McLovin). It's good stuff.

            Sure the plot may not be the most complex or the most captivating and the graphics have "greenscreen" written all over them but that is not the point of a movie like this. Do you want to be yelling with laughter at the insane antics that get crazier minute after minute? Are you ready for some adult humor in an adult setting? This is the reason people love coming to the movies in the first place--to become more in touch with the people in them. Grade: See For Yourself

...And Now You Don't.

Now You See Me
            Slight of hand and illusions are the reason everybody loves a good magician. At every birthday party, street corner and television special we've spotted a magician showing off death-defying stunts and pick-pocket routines that befuddle audiences and anger the volunteer's whose watch they've slipped off their hand. Now You See Me has every trick in the book, special effect and more, but also has added some that even the audience in the theater can predict the outcome of.
            There is a lot to cover with a movie like this one (i.e. many ups and downs). Starting with the story itself, we have four magicians/illusionists with four different magical talents. By some force of nature and with a little bit of pixie dust, they are all united to form The Four Horsemen. The show that this quartet headlines involves paying back a crowd that all have a financial dilemma in common. To get to the gist of their show: bursts of money is involved over the audience and said money is not usually obtained by the magicians in a morally sound way. Sounds like your kind of show, right? Michael Caine (The Dark Knight) said the same thing as dollar signs appeared in his eyes as the show's producer. The film takes many twists and turns and does (I will admit) have an ending that is worth the almost two hour wait, if you find you're getting bored or lost.
            One trick I did not see coming was the star-studded cast that almost entirely did not belong in this movie to begin with. Let me explain. Jesse Eisenberg (The Social Network), the leader of the Four Horsemen, dons a thin goatee that probably took 3 weeks to grow and is supposedly the master magician that every up and comer looks at for inspiration. How old is Eisenberg, again? His fast-speaking, condescending antics that can also be seen in every other movie he has been in don't seem to fit the seasoned entertainer that director Louis Leterrier (Clash of the Titans, The Incredible Hulk) yearned to illustrate. Who am I to critique, though? Next up is the truly seasoned magic performer and only mentalist of the group, Woody Harrelson (White Men Can't Jump). In the opinion of this critic, he stole the show, I would pay just to see his character do what he does on a stage with mind games. Isla Fisher (Wedding Crashers) seems to be having a big year after making a small appearance as Myrtle Wilson in The Great Gatsby and now as the escape artist with an annoying voice. The fourth but not least, Dave Franco (21 Jump Street) is making more of a Hollywood image for himself in this film despite the large shadow cast by his older brother whose first name escapes me. Franco is the next big name in magic and is pretty good with the slight-of-hands street magic that's easy to hustle a few bucks off a stranger.
            There are more people in this movie than just four magicians and their producer. Morgan Freeman, and his Morgan Freeman-like voice, does a decent job as the guy every magician hates who looks to debunk every light show trick and distraction the audience sees on stage or TV. He is tag-teaming the tactics and intelligence of this unlawful magic show with FBI agent Mark Ruffalo (The Avengers) and takes many [unnecessary (if you ask me)] steps to getting to the bottom of every trick thrown at them. One refreshing face that makes an appearance is Melanie Laurent (Inglourious Basterds). She is charming and captivating as Ruffalo's tagalong partner that is new to the public force. Now You See Me has everything Criss Angel or David Copperfield would love as a part of their shows and is a fast-paced crime thriller, but the young blood that is mixed in with the veteran actors is where it is easy to lose the enchantment one would hope for in attendance at a magic show. Grade: 7/10